What did I say last week? Ahh, here’s the very quote: “I’m going to give you ‘site stats so you can chart the page visits here at Food Is Love and Fat Is Freedom. Stats about me, and stats about the ‘site — and you’ll get an update every Tuesday! How cool is that?”
What was I thinking??
Well, let’s start with me. My “stats”, such as they are appear below:
|Date:||November 12, 2013|
|Mac & Cheese, or something|
|9 or 10 Moxies|
|Maybe I’m not much of an eater??|
|Plenty of Mocha Frappes (5 maybe)|
|Big Sombrero + 5 cookies, nightly|
<NOTE TO YOU COMPUTER WIZARDS — The chart, which looks like total crap, looked pretty good when I pasted it on my post draft. I copied it from an Excel sheet. How can I make it look like it’s supposed to?>
So, like, I lost half a pound in a week. Does that merit a “Yippee!” or a “Boo!”. Neither, really, since I have no intention of losing weight; none of gaining; and none, even, of staying the same. I’m only posting my weight stats because I think it’s so damned hot when women post them.
So, ladies, if I can do it so can you. I’m looking for a detailed report — and I want one every week! I’m not asking because I’m some kind of jerk — I’m asking because I’m a FEEDER. I’ll feed you with Haagen Dazs and I’ll feed me with numbers.
Now, what sort of stats are we looking at here at Food Is Love and Fat Is Freedom? Is the news good, or is it bad??
Well, as you learned last week, there were 29 page views for the seven days ending November 4.
And, as you are learning right now, there were 85 page views for the seven days ending November 11.
Nice work all you blubber lovers! That’s a 193% increase. That’s like a 120 pound girl working her way up to 352 delicious pounds. Think of how proud you’d be of her! Well, that’s how proud I am of all of you!